Lessons from Literature

i've been reading a book called In Her Shoes. i picked it up when i went to buhl, idaho with one of my favorite people in the world. she's my roommate, don't get excited. buhl is a small town that is growing at what some might consider an alarming rate. there's a fairly new mcdonald's there. while there, i rediscovered that although i rarely find cool clothes at thrifts stores, i can always find good books.

the movie, which is based on the book, is one of my favorites because of the way that it depicts the human condition. it reminds me that as human beings we are imperfect. it reminds me that i do not have the right to expect perfection from anyone or myself for that matter. it reminds me that although we do have the capacity to love, we cannot, yet, love flawlessly. it also reminds me that we would do well to learn to accept love, though imperfect (and potentially unexpected) it may be. it also reminds me that even when life changes unexpectedly, it is beautiful and wonderful.

reading the book has solidified these ideas and opinions and it has presented me with some new ones. one of the main characters is a grandmother who has settled in  "a retirement community for active seniors" in florida. in her efforts to build a relationship with a distant granddaughter, she seeks the help of one of her fellow active seniors who has had more experience with the younger generation.

"'Information,' Mrs. Lefkowitz said. 'That's what we have that the young people want . Information.' She considered. 'And some Microsoft stock, in my case. But for you, information ought to be enough.'"

as i read that, i realized how much that is so very true for me. i've always had a desire to hear the stories of those who came before. but because of distance (in one form or another) i haven't been able to hear the stories that are part of my history. and suddenly, though it happened in may, the death of my grandfather, the oldest person in my genetic coding, has become just a bit more heartbreaking.

 i realized that i won't get to hear his stories. he wasn't able to tell me to be wary of boys. he didn't teach me about farming or hard work. he never told me about walking to school, for hours, barefoot. he couldn't teach me about being a father, a grandfather, a great-grandfather. he didn't teach me about what it meant to be in love or to have a spouse. and though i have learned about all of these things, i want, so deeply to be taught them by someone who will love me unconditionally and perfectly imperfectly.